


Striking At The Heart

by Anxiouslykitty



Category: Madam Secretary
Genre: Anger, Emotional Hurt, Multi, Parenthood, hurtful words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-17 05:07:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29219955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anxiouslykitty/pseuds/Anxiouslykitty
Summary: Jason is having trouble having another adult in his life and Nadine bears the brunt of it.
Relationships: Elizabeth McCord/Henry McCord/Nadine Tolliver
Comments: 25
Kudos: 17





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I got this idea from a small encounter in another story and decided to take it and blow it up and give you all the angst.

Nadine was sitting at the table trying to finish a report about a possible coup in Africa, but she was having trouble concentrating. She had spent most of her life working in busy and often loud offices, but the McCord house was something else. She had finally succeeded in glaring Allison into having her conversation in another room and Stevie was doing her own work so she wasn’t a problem. Jason on the other hand was playing a very violent video game on full volume not three feet away. She had tried to just let it go because it wasn’t that big of a deal, but every time something blew up in the game it made her jump and pulled her focus from her work. She was already on hour seventeen of her day and she really wanted to get to bed.

“Jason would you mind turning that down please” Nadine called over without looking up from her report.

From the corner of her eye she watched Jason. He made no move to turn the game down or look at her. She waited a minute before turning towards him with a sigh.

“Jason, did you hear me” Nadine asked. “Can you please turn the game down, I’m trying to work?”

Jason picked up the remote and made a dramatic affair of turning the volume down one level before throwing the remote back on the couch and continuing to play his game. Nadine could feel the irritation building up in her and she took a deep breath. She stood and walked over next to the couch so that she could see him, but wasn’t blocking his game. She picked up the remote and turned the volume down more than halfway.

“You know that wasn’t what I meant,” Nadine said as she set the remote down on the coffee table.

Jason slammed his control down on the coffee table and stood up. The sudden movement made Nadine take a step back. She had never seen Jason truly angry, but she could imagine that was what this was.

“You can’t just go touching other people’s things” Jason shouted.

“I asked you to turn the volume down and you weren’t listening,” Nadine explained calmly. “Now the volume is down and you can keep playing your game and I can work on my report.”

Nadine could see out of the corner of her eye that Stevie had stood up and come around the table so that she was only a few steps away from her and Jason. She knew that Elizabeth and Henry would have heard the yelling from the office and she was getting a little worried about how out of hand this situation was going to get. If she’d known he was going to get this angry she would have just gone and sat in the sitting room with her work.

“You’re not my mother” Jason shouted. “You’re not anybody’s mother. You would make a horrible mother. You’re just some mean old woman that my parents are fucking until they find someone they like more. You shouldn’t even be here so you could you just fuck off.”

Nadine used all of her years of political experience to school her face. She could feel her anger building up and then embarrassment and sadness overwhelmed it. She clutched her arms around herself tightly trying desperately to hold herself tall. She knew she couldn’t say anything because it felt like her throat had closed up completely. She looked Jason straight in the eyes and all she saw was hatred and anger. She turned abruptly and pushed past Stevie who she realized was a lot closer than she thought and tried not to run as she went up the stairs.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok fine I won't leave you guys hanging. Here's another chapter.

Elizabeth was frozen in the kitchen staring at her son. Could her sweet little boy have really just said that to the woman she loved? Could he really be that hurtful? Her mind was reeling with how she was supposed to reprimand him when the sound of a slap rang through the room.

“Stevie” she scolded without hesitation.

Stevie was standing with tears on her face and Jason had a hand held to his left cheek. 

“You have no right to talk to her like that” Stevie snapped. “I didn’t think you could be this horrible of a person. I’m embarrassed that you're my brother if this is how you’re willing to behave to people who care about you.”

Stevie stormed past Elizabeth and went up the stairs. Henry appeared behind Elizabeth and placed his hand comfortingly on her lower back. She was just staring at Jason who was now looking at his parents with anger and hurt in his eyes. She almost couldn’t look at him because she was so torn between loving him and loving Nadine. She never thought there would be a moment where she would have to choose between her children and Nadine and yet here it was. She felt sick to her stomach. 

“Would you like to explain to us why you thought any of what you just did and said was acceptable” Henry said in a measured voice that Elizabeth knew meant he was seconds from snapping.

“Everything I said was true” Jason snapped. “She shouldn’t even be here. I don’t care who you guys screw, but why do we have to have her around all the time?”

Elizabeth saw red and she felt Henry’s hand slip around her waist and tighten before she had the chance to move. She clamped her own hand over her mouth to keep from saying anything that was running through her mind. She was so furious she wasn’t sure she could trust herself to say anything without hurting her son and no matter what he was saying she wasn’t going to do that. 

“That’s enough,” Henry stated loudly.

Henry tightened his grip on Elizabeth and rubbed his thumb comfortingly against her stomach.

“You don’t have to like Nadine, but you do have to respect her” Henry began. “You have no right to say things to her that you know are hurtful. Even if you don’t like her that is no reason for you to seek out ways to cause her pain. That is not how we raised you. If you are going to purposefully hurt people because you don’t feel like you’re getting your way then we are going to have to reevaluate the way we are currently handling things with you.”

“So she invades our lives and I’m the one who gets in trouble” Jason shouts.

Elizabeth was shaking she was so upset. Henry brought his other hand over and grabbed her elbow gently.

“You are in trouble because you chose to hurt someone for no reason and we don’t accept that behavior in this house” Henry replied.

Elizabeth dropped the hand that was covering her mouth.

“Nadine didn’t invade our lives” Elizabeth said shakily. “We invited her into our lives and we have taken things slowly to allow you kids time to get used to it.”

Elizabeth pulled out of Henry’s grip and took a step toward Jason.

“I will always love you Jason” Elizabeth rasped. “But right now I don’t like the person you are choosing to be.”

Elizabeth turned and walked up the stairs in search of Nadine. She stopped on the landing out of view of anyone and leaned heavily against the wall. She took in long deep breaths trying to convince her body to stop shaking. She could hear Henry continuing to talk to Jason and then the stomping footsteps that told her she needed to get upstairs and out of the way. Stevie was sitting outside the door to Henry and Elizabeth’s room when she got upstairs. Jason’s door slamming shut told her she had gotten off the landing just in time to avoid another confrontation. 

“I tried to talk to her,” Stevie said quietly.

“It’s alright honey” Elizabeth replied.

“I’m sorry for hitting Jason,” Stevie said. “I’ve just never been more disappointed in someone. I was so shocked he could say any of that about her.”

“We’ll talk about it later” Elizabeth said, pulling Stevie to her feet. “You go to bed.”

Stevie hugged her mom tight and then turned and went to her room quietly closing the door behind her. Alison poked her head out of her room and looked at her mom.

“Is everything okay” Alison asked quietly.

“It will be” Elizabeth replied. “Go to bed, Noodle.”

Alison closed the door and Elizabeth turned to face her own closed bedroom door. Slowly she opened it and walked in. Nadine was moving like a flurry through the room throwing things into a bag that was on the bed. 

“Nadine,” Elizabeth said, closing the door behind her. 

Nadine didn’t stop moving, she continued to shove things into the bag, Elizabeth took a few steps further into the room so that she was standing partially in the way of Nadine’s ability to get to the bag.

“Nadine,” Elizabeth said again. 

Nadine pushed past Elizabeth to push another handful of clothing into the bag. Elizabeth could see now that she was grabbing anything that was hers from the room and trying to fit it all into one suitcase. 

“Sweetheart” Elizabeth said, reaching out and grabbing Nadine’s arm. “Sweetheart stop for a second.”

Nadine stood frozen in Elizabeth’s grasp. She wouldn’t look at Elizabeth, but kept staring intently at the bag in front of her. Elizabeth stepped in front of Nadine and turned her so they were facing each other completely.

“What are you doing” Elizabeth asked quietly.

“I need to go home,” Nadine whispered.

Elizabeth had never seen Nadine look this small. Her whole body looked like she was one bad breath away from collapsing. Elizabeth wanted to just wrap her up and never let her go. The thought that one of her children was the one that did this to Nadine was just heart wrenching.

“Okay, but why are you packing up all your things” Elizabeth asked.

“I need to go home,” Nadine replied.

“We can go to your condo tonight if it would make you feel better” Elizabeth offered.

“No you need to stay here” Nadine replied.

“Well then Henry will go with you” Elizabeth offered.

“You both need to stay here” Nadine replied. “You’re children need you both and I need to go home.”

“We aren’t just going to let you go off by yourself when you’re upset” Elizabeth replied. “What Jason said…”

“What Jason said was true” Nadine said, lifting her head so that her eyes met Elizabeth’s.

“No it wasn’t” Elizabeth said sternly. “Nothing he said was true.”

“I’m not his mother,” Nadine replied.

“No you’re not” Elizabeth began. “But you weren’t trying to be. You didn’t step over the line or do anything that would warrant his reaction. You are not the one at fault here.”

“I was a horrible mother,” Nadine whispered.

“No you weren’t” Elizabeth replied. “You brought your son up all on your own. Not many people can do that. You weren’t a horrible mother and you still aren’t.”

“Good mothers don’t have children who haven’t talked to them in years,” Nadine explained. “I won’t come between you and Henry and your children.”

“You’re not…” Elizabeth began.

“I need to go,” Nadine said, pulling away from Elizabeth and closing the suitcase.

“Let’s talk about this Nadine,” Elizabeth said. “I don’t want you to run away from us.”

Nadine grabbed the suitcase from the bed and began lugging it out of the bedroom. It was obviously heavy and caused her body to sway from side to side as she tried to carry it as comfortably as possible. Elizabeth tried to grab it from her and Nadine yanked it out of the way before heading down the front staircase. Elizabeth followed her continuously trying to grab the suitcase from her.

“Wait Nadine” Elizabeth stuttered. “Wait and talk to us. Please don’t just walk out.”

When they go to the bottom of the staircase Nadine headed for the door. Elizabeth knew that the second Nadine went out the door she wouldn’t be able to follow her.

“Henry” Elizabeth shouted. “Henry!”


	3. Chapter 3

Henry heard Elizabeth yelling for him from the kitchen where he had been trying to calm himself down after sending Jason to his room. He went through to the front hallway and saw Nadine headed for the door with a large overstuffed suitcase. Elizabeth was following behind her looking from Nadine to Henry.

“Please Nadine just stop for a minute” Elizabeth pleaded.

“What’s going on” Henry asked.

“I need to go home Henry,” Nadine said with her hand on the door.

“Alright, I’ll take you home” Henry offered. “You don’t have your car here remember.”

Nadine started shaking her head. She wouldn’t turn and look at them; she just kept a firm hand on the door handle and looked down at the ground.

“You need to be here with the kids” Nadine responded. “I’ll get a cab. It’s fine.”

Nadine opened the door and started out of the house. Elizabeth started after her but Henry caught her arm and pulled her back.

“You can’t go chasing after her,” Henry said.

“She’s upset I’m not just going to let her go out there by herself” Elizabeth replied trying to yank her arm from Henry’s grip.

“I know, but you can’t be chasing her down the street in the middle of the night because then security will have to be with you. Do you really think that is going to make her feel better” Henry questioned. “I’ll go after her. You stay here. Okay?”

Elizabeth slumped in on herself a bit and Henry wrapped her in his arms and gave her a kiss on the top of the head. He knew she knew that she couldn’t go. Elizabeth wouldn’t have called for him if she didn’t know she couldn’t chase after Nadine once she left the house, but there’s a difference between knowing and doing. 

“Don’t worry babe” Henry comforted. “We’ll work it out.”

Henry went out the door and asked one of the security detail which direction Nadine had gone. He silently pointed down the street and Henry took off in that direction. When he rounded the first corner he saw Nadine kneeling over her suitcase which had obviously broken open and her things were littered around her. She was trying to shove things back into it when Henry approached her slowly.

“Nadine” Henry greeted.

“Go home Henry” Nadine gasped. “I’m fine….I’m fine.”

Henry knelt down next to her and placed his hand gently on her shoulder.

“Honey, why don’t you stop for a second and look at me” Henry encouraged.

Nadine continued to try and shove all of her things back into her bag. Henry gently reached around her and grabbed both of her shoulders. He turned her towards him and she grabbed his arms tightly. She refused to look at him.

“Nadine look at me,” Henry instructed. “Please!”

When Nadine finally looked up she was crying. She was taking small shuddering breaths and when she made eye contact with Henry her hands dropped from his arms and she slumped forward in his grip. Henry pulled her into his lap and to his chest. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and hugged her close.

“Oh honey” Henry cooed.

“I never wanted to come between you and Elizabeth and your kids” Nadine whimpered.

“You aren't,” Henry replied. “Jason is a teenager and he is lashing out because he thinks he is having another parent forced upon him. He’ll adjust. He’s never been much for change. It takes him time, but he had no right to say those things to you and he and I will have a talk when he’s calmed down.”

“He was right,” Nadine said so quietly that Henry almost couldn’t hear her.

“No he wasn’t” Henry replied sternly. “Those things he said were hurtful and untrue. What about what he said is bothering you the most?”

“I don’t know” Nadine whimpered.

“Why don’t we go back to the house and we can go up and talk with Elizabeth” Henry offered.

Nadine let out a sob and clung tighter to Henry’s sleeve. 

“We can’t stay here on the ground honey,” Henry said.

Nadine just held onto him tightly and buried her head in his chest. He could feel the dampness seeping into his shirt. It was cold outside and neither of them had on a coat. He could feel Nadine begin to shiver. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and called Stevie.

“Stevie, can you come outside around the corner and help me please” Henry said into the phone.

He hung up and slipped the phone into his back pocket before wrapping his arm back around Nadine. It only took Stevie a minute or two to get to them and she approached slowly and quietly.

“Will you please get Nadine’s stuff together and bring it back to the house” Henry asked.

“Of course” Stevie said, eyeing Nadine.

“Okay Honey let’s stand up and we’ll walk back to the house” Henry instructed.

Nadine loosened her grip just enough for them both to stand and then tucked herself tightly against Henry. Henry kept her held to him as they walked back to the house. The security all looked away and remained silent as Henry escorted Nadine back into the house. Nothing had ever been said, but they all respected what Elizabeth, Henry and Nadine had.


	4. Chapter 4

Elizabeth was pacing back and forth in front of the door waiting for them to get back. He knew that when he called Stevie that Elizabeth would want to come with and he assumed Stevie had had to placate Elizabeth to get her to stay. When she heard the door open and saw Nadine curled tightly in Henry’s arms she rushed at them. Nadine let go of Henry and wrapped her arms around Elizabeth. Elizabeth held her tightly while looking up at Henry. He closed the door behind them and then wrapped his arms around them both. 

“Oh baby” Elizabeth cooed. “Let’s go up to bed.”

Elizabeth didn’t wait for a response. She pulled Nadine along with her up the front staircase to their bedroom. When they got to the top landing she looked back at Henry to see where he had gone. 

“I need to talk to Jason” Henry said. “I’ll be in later.”

Elizabeth guided Nadine to their room and closed the door behind them. Once the door was closed Henry turned towards Jason’s room. He stopped in front of Jason’s room and took a few deep breaths. He wanted to make sure he was completely calm before he went in and talked to him. He knocked on the door and when there was no response he opened it and went in.

“Hey,” Henry greeted. “We need to talk.”

“What are you guys just going to start barging into our rooms now” Jason snipped. “Is this where you tell me what my punishment is for speaking my mind? I thought we were supposed to be a family that was honest with each other.”

Henry took another deep breath and centered all of his irritation and anger into a small space out of his reach. He tried to focus on appearing calm and collected.

“First of all it’s our house so we can come and go as we please” Henry began. “We try to be respectful of you kids, but tonight you weren’t being a very respectful person so i think an exception was warranted. Second, you're not in trouble for being honest. You’re in trouble for being hurtful. If you honestly have a problem with Nadine that should have been a conversation that was had peacefully with me and your mother.”

“So what’s my punishment” Jason grumbled.

“I’m not here to talk about punishment,” Henry explained. “We’ll talk about punishment tomorrow once I’ve had a chance to talk to your mom.”

“Then what do you want” Jason snipped.

“What you said was hurtful and cruel downstairs,” Henry explained. “You never know how much something can hurt another person if you don’t take the time to know that person. Do you have any idea why what you said hurt Nadine so much?”

Jason didn’t answer. He was sitting on his bed with his arms across his chest. Henry wouldn’t say it but he looked like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. Jason was refusing to make eye contact with Henry so Henry kept going.

“Did you know that Nadine has a son” Henry asked.

This seemed to get Jason’s attention. He glanced up a bit, but refused to back down from his anger.

“Great so why doesn’t she go be his mother and leave me alone” Jason snapped.

“She can’t because her son doesn’t talk to her anymore,” Henry explained. “It’s something that weighs very heavily on her heart and that she is very ashamed about.”

Henry could see that Jason was starting to understand some of what Henry was getting at. His arms loosened a little and his face began to read less anger and more thought.

“Have you ever thought about what Nadine’s life was like before she met us” Henry asked.

Still Jason didn’t respond. He was too old to be caught in the rhetorical question game that Henry liked to use on the kids when they were angry.

“She was in a relationship with a man before us who hurt her,” Henry explained. “He lied to her and led her on and made her feel like she was completely disposable. Can you imagine what it feels like to be made to feel like a person you love could just leave you one day for no reason?”

Jason’s body relaxed even more and Henry could see that sadness creeping across his face. Somewhere in there the thoughtful and loving Jason that he knew existed was starting to win the war over the angry teenager who had taken over.

“You said things tonight that you thought would be the most outlandish,” Henry explained. “In reality you hit really close to home on a few things. Because you never took the time to get to know Nadine you didn’t know those things would hurt her as much as they did. What was your intention when you got mad earlier?”

Jason looked up at Henry for a second before dropping his gaze again.

“I don’t know,” Jason grumbled.

“Do you realize that you made Nadine cry” Henry asked. “That she packed all of her things and tried to leave because she didn’t want us to lose our son like she lost hers?”

Jason’s face crumpled and he turned away from Henry.

“I was just mad” Jason choked out. “I didn’t really want to hurt her. So much has changed and having another adult telling me what to do. I don’t know why I said those things. They just popped into my head and they were out of mouth before I could do anything. Did she really leave?”

“She tried to and she got around the corner before her suitcase broke and she was sitting on the wet ground crying trying to shove everything back in it when I found her” Henry explained.

Henry knew it was probably more than he should be telling Jason, but he knew his son needed to understand the full repercussions of his actions. All of his kids were people who needed to see the whole picture if they were to understand their missteps. Even if that meant knowing more than they should.

“I’m sorry” Jason whimpered.

Henry walked over to the bed and knelt down so he could see Jason’s face. Jason was crying and Henry reached up and pulled Jason in a tight hug. Jason clung to Henry like he had when he was a little kid,

“I didn’t mean to hurt her that much,” Jason cried.

“I know,” Henry replied. “This is why our words are so important. Even the smallest moment of anger can truly hurt a person.”

Jason sniffled and pulled away from Henry.

“I should apologize,” Jason said.

“Not tonight” Henry responded. “But yes I think tomorrow you need to apologize to Nadine and I think you need to have a talk with your mom and with Stevie.”

“Stevie hit me,” Jason said.

“She did and I will talk to her about that,” Henry replied. “Stevie knows a bit more about Nadine than you do. She knew what you said hurt Nadine and she knew Nadine wouldn’t do anything about it so she did the only thing she thought she could to defend someone she cares about. It wasn’t the right choice, but just like you she was acting in the moment.”

Jason nodded his head and Henry gave him a small smile.

"Is mom really mad at me" Jason asked.

"I don't want to talk for your mom" Henry replied. "But I think she felt torn like I did. We both love you a great deal, but we also love Nadine."

"Do you think she'll forgive me" Jason asked. 

"You're mom loves you" Henry replied.

Jason nodded solemnly and looked down. 

“Why don’t you go to sleep” Henry offered. “We’ll talk more tomorrow.”

Henry got up and left the room without looking back. Jason was a good kid somewhere in there. He just needed the reminder to be that good kid and not the angry teenager.


	5. Chapter 5

When Elizabeth closed the door behind them she noticed that Nadine was shivering and her clothes were damp from being on the ground. Elizabeth let her go and went over to her dresser and pulled out a pair of her pajamas that Nadine loved. She handed them to Nadine.

“Why don't you get comfortable and I’ll go make us some tea” Elizabeth offered.

“Please don’t leave” Nadine whispered.

Elizabeth thought her heart would break. She had never heard Nadine speak so meekly in all the years she had known her. Even very early on when Nadine had talked about Marsh’s death she had never sounded so sad and small. Elizabeth walked back over and hugged Nadine.

“I won’t leave,” Elizabeth said, giving her a kiss on her forehead.

Nadine quietly changed into Elizabeth’s borrowed pajamas and Elizabeth took the opportunity to change into another set of her pajamas. Once they were both comfortable they crawled into bed together. Elizabeth opened her arms and Nadine curled up with her head on Elizabeth’s chest and her arm across her stomach.

“I’m sorry for what Jason said,” Elizabeth said. “Nothing he said was true.”

“I feel silly for how much his words are affecting me” Nadine whimpered.

Elizabeth pulled her a little tighter to her body.

“What about it is bothering you the most” Elizabeth asked.

“I’m old,” Nadine whispered.

“You’re not old,” Elizabeth scoffed.

“I’m older than both you and Henry,” Nadine replied.

“That doesn’t matter to us,” Elizabeth replied. “Is that what’s bothering you?”

Nadine shook her head against Elizabeth’s chest.

“How many were there before me” Nadine asked.

Nadine felt stiff as a board in her arms and Elizabeth knew she was nervous. She could feel Nadine holding her breath waiting for the answer.

“Since we were married we have each had one other partner” Elizabeth explained. “But we have never shared a partner before. You’re the first.”

“But Jason said” Nadine began.

“I think we need to agree that what Jason said was out of anger and was not entirely truthful” Elizabeth reminded. “We also need to remember that he is still a teenager and may not be able to understand the things he saw growing up. Before you we never made much of an effort to explain our relationships to the kids.”

“I don’t think I’d survive if you both sent me away” Nadine whimpered.

“Oh honey” Elizabeth cooed. “We are not sending you away. We both love you!”

Nadine started to quietly cry burying her face into Elizabeth’s chest.

The sound of the door opening and closing brought Henry into the room. He didn’t say anything and Elizabeth watched as he changed into pajamas before crawling in on the other side of the bed. He scooted over until she could look eye to eye with him. He wrapped an arm around Nadine sandwiching her between the two of them. He gave Elizabeth a gentle kiss on the lips and the three of them settled together. Elizabeth stayed awake until she was sure that Nadine was asleep. This was not how she thought this night would end and she wasn’t sure what they were going to do tomorrow, but for now she was grateful to still have Nadine in her arms.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is later than I meant.

Nadine opened her eyes slowly in the bright room. Her head ached and she felt exhausted. She reached over for Elizabeth, but found that the bed was completely empty. She was never the last one awake so she was surprised. Rolling over she saw a glass of water with a note propped against it on the nightstand. She reached over and grabbed the note. Her glasses weren’t anywhere to be found so she squinted at the note only making her headache worse.

_Nadine,_

_You're staying home today. Blake and Jay have everything handled. Rest and take some time. Henry is staying home with you and I will try to be home as early as I can._

_I love you,_   
_Elizabeth_

_P.S. - Take the aspirin. I know your head hurts and two aspirin aren’t going to kill you._

Nadine smiled at the note and looked back at the nightstand. Sure enough there were two aspirin next to the glass of water. She set the note down and picked up the pills swallowing them with a swig of water. She drank almost the whole glass surprised at how dehydrated she felt. She squinted at the clock and it read 8:30. She couldn’t remember the last time she slept in that late. Even on weekends she was awake by seven. 

She looked around for her phone and didn’t see it anywhere. She assumed Henry had taken it so that she couldn’t get wrapped into work when she was supposed to be resting. She felt silly for not going to work when she wasn’t sick. Jason was certainly not the first boy/man to hurt her feelings and she’d never called out sick before. It was different this time because she had Elizabeth and Henry and they would both do anything to protect her and take care of her. She hummed in contentment as she settled back into the pillows. 

There was a light knock on the door and Nadine looked over expecting Henry to come in. Nothing happened and then there was another small knock. 

“Come in” Nadine announced.

Slowly the door opened and Stevie came into the room. She was dressed for work and based on the time she was going in late.

“Did I wake you” Stevie asked.

“No, I just woke up,” Nadine replied.

Stevie came over to the bed and awkwardly sat on the side. Since Nadine was on Elizabeth’s side it left most of the bed between her and Stevie.

“I’m sorry about last night,” Stevie said.

“What do you have to be sorry about” Nadine asked.

She couldn’t think of a single thing that Stevie had done last night that she should be sorry about. Nadine could barely remember her being there after it all started.

“I shouldn’t have slapped Jason even if I was standing up for you” Stevie replied. “And I’m sorry that I had to go through your things.”

“No you shouldn’t have slapped your brother” Nadine began. “I’m not the one you should be apologizing to though. As for my things, why did you have to go through them?”

“They were all over the ground and by the time I got them back in your bag and back to the house everything was dirty and wet” Stevie explained. “I had to take everything out and clean it. There’s a lot of things at the dry cleaners.”

Nadine scooted across the bed and reached her hand out to Stevie. Stevie looked up and grabbed Nadine’s offered hand. Nadine squeezed it tightly and smiled.

“Thank you,” Nadine said earnestly. “That’s not something to apologize for. I appreciate you taking the time to do that. I wasn’t even thinking last night about my clothes.”

Stevie gave Nadine a small smile, but Nadine could still see that she was unsure about everything. Stevie was the one most like Elizabeth and she wanted to be able to protect her family. Nadine felt honored that Stevie included her in that group.

“Why don't you get off to work before Russell comes looking for you” Nadine instructed. “Apparently I’m taking a day off so that means no Russel for me.”

Nadine laughed and Stevie chuckled. She stood and straightened her clothes before heading for the door. In the doorway Stevie stopped and looked back at Nadine.

“I hope you know Jason was wrong last night” Stevie said. “You’re not a horrible mother.”

Stevie disappeared out the door and Nadine sat back in the pillows. She wiped the tears that had escaped without her knowledge. She was just letting herself get comfortable again when there was another knock on the door. She wasn’t sure who it would be this time. Both of the other kids should have been at school by now and Henry certainly wouldn’t knock.

“Come in,” Nadine called out.

Slowly the door opened and Jason walked in carrying a tray with a muffin and a cup of coffee on it. He walked over to the bed and gently set it down, careful not to spill the coffee. The muffin was obviously not one they had in the house which meant he would have had to go out and get it. The tray not only had the breakfast, but also a single flower laid down across a napkin.

Nadine looked up at Jason almost shyly. It wasn’t that she was afraid of Jason. She knew he wouldn’t hurt her and that last night was just him lashing out, but she felt uncertain of him now. She had never felt this uncertain around someone before. She was used to feeling confident and sure in every situation. She was embarrassed about how she reacted to what he had said and she wasn’t sure how much he had seen.

Jason stood awkwardly next to the bed avoiding looking at Nadine. Nadine was avoiding looking too much at Jason. They both were quiet for a long time. Nadine knew being the adult she should be the first to talk, but she was hesitant. She wanted Jason to be the one to talk, because he had obviously brought her breakfast for a reason. After a minute or two Jason finally broke the silence.

“Nadine” Jason began, shifting awkwardly.

“Is there something you want to say Jason” Nadine asked quietly.

Jason glanced at her before looking down again.

“I’m sorry for what I said last night” Jason said in a rush.

“Thank you” Nadine replied.

“I...I umm” Jason stammered. “I shouldn’t have said those things.”

Nadine knew she needed to make a decision as to whether she was going to let him off the hook or talk to him. 

“I know you were upset” Nadine began. “You really hurt me though.”

Jason glanced at her again and this time Nadine tried to keep his eyes, but he looked away.

“I didn’t...I don’t” Jason stammered. “I’m…”

“Jason” Nadine interrupted. “Take a deep breath.”

Jason stopped and took a deep breath. Nadine took the time to take a deep breath of her own.

“I was mad and I didn’t really want to hurt you like I did” Jason said.

“I know you were mad” Nadine replied. “I deal with a lot of people who are mad and say things that are hurtful out of anger. It’s not the best way to deal with your anger.”

“I didn’t mean to make you cry” Jason mumbled.

Nadine tucked her head in embarrassment. She wasn’t sure he had known she had broken down after what he said and now that she did she was embarrassed.

“I...I…” Nadine stammered a little. “Your intention does not always matter to the other person. Sometimes the effect of your words goes further than you intend.”

“Dad talked to me about why what I said hurt you so much,” Jason explained.

“And what did your dad tell you” Nadine asked.

“He said you have a son” Jason began. “If I had known I never would have said you were...I wouldn’t have said what I said.”

“You can never know something about a person unless you get to know them,” Nadine said. “Did he tell you anything else?”

“He said you used to be with someone who was mean to you” Jason replied.

“That’s true,” Nadine agreed. “It took me a very long time to trust your parents and enter into a relationship with them.”

“I don’t want to be the one that comes between the three of you” Jason said.

“Jason come over here” Nadine instructed patting her side of the bed.

Jason looked at her reluctantly. Nadine patted the bed again and Jason walked around the bed and sat down awkwardly on the edge of the bed.

“Jason, my relationship with your parents is between them and me “ Nadine explained. “It’s okay if you and I can’t be friends, but no matter what happens between your parents and I it won’t be your fault.”

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” Jason said quietly.

“What do you mean” Nadine asked.

“I don’t know how to not be angry sometimes” Jason explained. “It’s not that I don’t like you. I just don’t know how we’re supposed to treat each other.”

The honesty Jason was providing was startling to Nadine. Other than being on the periphery of a few ideological discussions he had taken place in with his parents or sisters, she hadn’t really talked much to him. They had mostly just skirted around each other clashing whenever they got too close. 

“Maybe we can try to figure that out together,” Nadine offered. “I’m not trying to be your mom, but I’m also not just another one of your mom’s co-workers. It doesn’t have to be today, but we’ll figure it out. As long as you keep being honest with me I’ll always be honest with you.”

“I think I can do that,” Jason said. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course” Nadine said.

“Do you love my parents” Jason asked.

Nadine gave Jason a small smile which made him glance down nervously.

“I love your parents more than I’ve loved anyone” Nadine gushed.

Jason blushed a little and Nadine could feel a blush creep up her cheeks, but she refused to look away from Jason.

“Good” Jason replied without looking back at Nadine.

Jason abruptly stood and walked towards the door. Nadine watched him ready to let him leave. They had covered a lot more than she thought they would. Jason stopped at the door and looked back at Nadine.

“I really am sorry” Jason said, before turning and leaving the room.

Nadine felt like she had run a marathon in the last day. She knew that teenagers were complicated. She could remember when her son was Jason's age he was moody, but then that hadn’t ended well. She had reacted badly and fought him at every turn. She had learned from Henry and Elizabeth. She had watched how they communicated with their children and she tried to adopt their mentality. It hadn’t been easy and things like Jason’s blow up last night were an example of how quickly things could get out of hand. She was glad though that she was able to talk to Jason about it and have him hopeful understand why what he said was so wrong. 

She picked up the coffee and took a large drink. It was still a little warm, but she didn’t mind it felt good. She pinched a little off the top of the muffin and popped it in her mouth. It was a blueberry muffin, her favorite. She wondered whether Henry had told Jason or if Jason had realized it on his own. 

She heard the door open and she looked up. Henry came in the room and shut the door behind him. He came around the bed to sit next to her. She gave him a small smile and set her coffee down on the nightstand.

“How are you feeling” Henry asked.

“I’ve got a headache, but I took the aspirin as Elizabeth instructed,” Nadine replied, nodding to the note on the nightstand. 

Henry smiled at her. They both knew how Elizabeth could be when she went full mom mode.

“I see you’ve had a visitor” Henry said.

“I have quite a few actually,” Nadine replied.

Henry quirked his eyebrow at her.

“Stevie popped in before she left for work and we talked for a minute,” Nadine explained. “Then Jason brought me breakfast and we talked for a while.”

“Are you okay” Henry asked.

“I think I am,” Nadine replied. “I’m a little embarrassed about how much I let Jason’s words get to me, but I’m okay.”

Henry leaned forward and kissed Nadine gently on the lips.

“You don’t have to be embarrassed for your feelings” Henry said. “Not with us.”

Nadine felt the tears well up in her eyes and she tried to will them away. Henry reached over her and grabbed the breakfast tray and placed it on the nightstand with the coffee. Then he climbed over Nadine and pulled her into his body. Nadine curled into Henry’s chest and let the tears fall.

“I’m sorry” Nadine whimpered.

“Oh honey” Henry cooed. “No sorrys.”

“Did either of the kids upset you when they came in this morning” Henry asked.

“No” Nadine responded defensively. “Stevie was sweet. She actually apologized for going through my things and washing everything that had gotten dirty. Jason was kind. We talked about a few things. I don’t think it will ever be as easy between us as it is with me and the girls, but I think he understands that we need to try harder.”

“You really are a good mother Nadine” Henry said.

“I’m not their mother” Nadine replied quickly.

“You don’t have to be their mother to be a mother to them” Henry replied. “You are a good mother figure to our children whether they think of you that way or not.”

Nadine curled tighter into Henry who hugged her close.

“I love you” Nadine whispered.

“I love you too” Henry replied, kissing her on the top of her head.

She still felt overwhelmed and she knew there were going to be many more conversations revolving around the events of last night, but for now she had never been more glad to take a day off of work.


End file.
